Friday, February 15, 2008

Believe it or not... actually interviewed me yesterday.

haha, i didn't want to say anything until it went up.

this is awesome.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

music man

i've been surprised i haven't been writing a lot while on this trip (other than the blog, i mean).

i have my guitar and all, but i've only ocassionally brought it out. i had kinda figured i'd have all these things to write about, and well, haha i probably do if any of you have been reading.

but i dunno. i think i'll just head to a park or something today, clear my head and just ramble on the guitar until something comes.

or maybe an asteroid will fall on me on the way to my car. who knows, these days...

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

maker's mark

i had way too much last night. i am still in pain.

and according to a comment on my last post, Victory included their news post about me in their newsletter.

haha. at least it's getting people to read the blog.

i need food.

Veal Chop called me last night. Seriously. "I'm sorry dude, i didn't mean for you to find out this way...".

why do people say that? what better way is there to find out about that? he acts like he was going to do me a favor.

oh well.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

when it fucking rains...

seriously. i can't win.

i just heard about all this, and i mean, i guess i'm flattered that "they support me."

but jesus christ, hacking victory's website? I ALREADY COMPLIED. i am not trying to hurt anyone. fuck, farewell to freeway is my favorite new band. i haven't been so into a band like that in so long. now this?

i don't need anymore crazy shit happening to me.
goddamn it, i almost wish i never put up those songs, or better yet, started this damn road trip.

what the hell else could possibly happen to me?

Kerouac must be laughing his ass off in his wandering grave, and if i knew where it was, i'd spit on it for getting hyped about traveling.

ok well no, but seriously. i don't even know what to say.
i just love music, i am not a hacker, and i do not know any hackers.

wow. i need a drink.

of all the things...

i got some messages about my post yesterday, and people are confused.
and not without surprise, as after all, i came to whatever fucking revelation i had about how much i missed samantha. i almost even went back home, for her.

until she broke up with me.

she read my post about what happened in Atlantic City. it's my own fucking fault for leaving it up, yeah whatever. but that's not even the worst part. at least that's understandable.

the worst, is that she fucked my best friend, Veal Chop.

on top of all the craziness that's been going on, my best friend fucked my (ex) girlfriend.
so what can i say, maybe i was emotional, maybe whatever, so i wrote that my thoughts on farewell’s lemmings song, cause at least michele is someone that has touched me and made me have hope.

Michele wrote an email about the leak thing, and well, what can i say, she was very sweet about it, like she was when i met her back in December. so i just started writing. i can wallow in all of this misery but i also have hope and faith that there is something else i can get out of this damn trip i'm on.

i have dreams and i'd like to think that something's there. i can't stop thinking about her. i hope she believes in fate. maybe it is fate, after all, i met Michele and the band right when i decided to make this trip. i wonder what she'd say if i saw her again?

anyway, laugh all you want, poetic justice, or whatever the fuck, cause i don't need it right now.

Monday, February 11, 2008

not giving in...

the majority of you have stated that I should remove these tracks. i am doing so because that is what the majority of you said was the right thing to do. so i am posting links to the band’s mySpace pages (on the right) in case you want to check out their music. what is the difference anyway, right? this should make everyone happy.

hahah i mean really. i gave some good promo to some bands that i like and met. i am really falling in love with farewell to freeway especially. i can understand to a point why the bands were upset and why they had victory have a cease and desist sent to me. tony at victory was actually cool about everything and told me that the bands were upset when i did not listen to them and that he has to defend them when asked. michele from farewell sent a nice message as well. so if i offended you i am sorry. sometimes my passion can take over but i never wanted to hurt anyone.

in other news i am not going home. i am going to “keep on truckin’” as they say down here. i am meeting too many great people and have a feeling these experiences will be with me forever.

A lemming for love

the farewell to freeway track lemmings has been stuck in my mind for weeks. especially since meeting their keyboardist michele back in december. i have never met such an honest artist that I feel I connected with so quickly. she has such strong qualities about her and a very magnetic vibe. i have had a feeling in my stomach ever since. it is weird and hard to explain. a bond was made within myself. i cannot stop thinking about her and the few moments where she spoke to me. I know we are thousands of miles away but I feel a connection. should I head west to California or go north and go home? has anyone else met someone and felt an immediate connection that cannot be explained. some of the lyrics from lemmings make me feel like we are somehow connected on a higher level.


the music and the experience of meeting you have made me feel very alive. so much so that I cannot explain it.


do you think of me? did I make an impression? did we connect on any level? do we have the same dreams (ever???) I am here but you are so far away. do we have a link? all I can do is look at the two photos I have and listen to the music and think. and dream. and wonder.


am I just lonely? Was it the time and place? I do not want to be lost. i want to be found. maybe we can find something together?


things feel like they are changing. different. maybe because the road is getting to me. maybe I am discovering who I really am. maybe the same is happening for you. or maybe, you have forgotten about me.